from here to maternity..

 Men.

I'm troubled with happiness and wariness thinking about the men in my life.

The man I thought I loved, Michael, held onto me for 3 years with his sheer bulk, high cheekbones, luscious lips, biceps as wide as my waist and creativeness. He also had beautiful eyes. And he was a great lay. Has to be said.

I waited.

I waited.

I was his booty call.

I waited.

He left overseas.

I left the mainland.

We talked (thank-you, MSN/Facebook), and I found myself longing for him. Heartstrings being played and tugged and licked and chewed.

Three years I held out. I waited for him.

Then, it changed.

I met someone else.
Online, no doubt.

Michael, suddenly was obsolete.

I met this someone at the local pub. He rescued me from the nasty, hungry eyes of 40 year old men. I instantly wanted him. For the sex, mostly. I thought, great, I can do this and not care.

I had just met him.

We drove to the woods.

He had a great sound system. Great ride.

To the fucking woods.

I liked him instantly.
I wasn't frightened.

This was danger and he was dangling me in it.

I knew this forest, no one would ever hear me scream.

We had sex.
Uh, a lot of it.

He told me I wasn't just a random fuck.

I blocked this out. No. I don't need to hear that, don't make me feel bad for what I'm doing.

I like you, he said, I really like you.

Yeah, whatever, you're inside me, next you'll be telling me you want my babies.

Well, turns out he does.

He wants to be with me. Really be with me.

And I want that. I want him.

I could have his babies.

I'm scared.

Frightened.

Let it go, girl..

Adventure?

I eat celery and parsnips, and he eats fish and chips, but we get along fine.

I've known him now for two weeks.

Somehow, I don't think I'm single anymore.